text: Irina Voiculescu

illustration: Raluca Cozmi

"If we can get awayANDof what the other thinksÞand ANDand if we can assume our personal story, we gain access to preÞself-forgetfulness" ("The imperfect giftsÞof June" - Brené Brown)

It's been a while since I've written anything that doesn't have anything to do with school. I thought this theme would be uANDor to address, then I realized that it is not really aANDa of simple as it seems to developÞand a subject without relying on research, but only on experienceÞa personal, one so common ANDand, at the same time, so complex.

Being at the beginning (somewhat) of spring, a time of love, a time of joy ANDand reindeerANDterre, it's very uANDi will forgetÞand of you, to forgetÞand take care of yourself ANDand your needs, to forgetÞand toÞyou grant it ANDi moments to breathe, then make sure everything is okay in your soul. ANDand what does it mean, after all, that everything is right in your soul? Are the joys of a moment not enough? I think not; I think this is actually definedÞtake self-love: to have the strength to assure yourself that it isANDyou good ANDand be reconciled with your own person ANDand when that moment of happiness passed.

ANDI know it's much more uANDbetter said than done, because, perfectÞbeing an ionist, not badANDI always go out to stand up for myselfANDwaiting. This is precisely why this article does not present a top 10 activityÞand to do so thatÞstrengthens themANDyour self-esteem, because I've heard them beforeÞat least once: do something you are passionate about, buyÞand flowers, ieANDand in nature, skincare and self care, writes in a journal, teachesÞto enjoy your own company, citeANDyou, ieANDand from the comfort zone ANDand the list can go on. I can't say that they are not effective, but in the long run it takes more than that.

Returning to the quote from the beginning, I chose it because, ofANDi'm not exactly a big fan of thatÞof personal development, resonated the most with me ANDI think it's a landmark worth taking into account. It's no secret that almost our entire lifeÞit revolves around the opinions of othersÞi, around dorinÞthem to integrate us, to please usÞi. In an attempt to anticipate the possible criticisms of those around us, out of the need to defend ourselves, we often end up becoming our biggest criticsANDthree From what I have observed myself, constructive criticism remains sacred. Self-love comes from the effort toÞi conANDheavy demandANDthem with the thought of learningÞof any of them, not to ground you. 

ANDand everythingANDand why is aANDis it hard? Because no one wants to access it and analyze hairÞlittle moreÞhappy lifeÞuh, it isANDthe echo, the "hard" choicesANDgo". Very often we are afraid of them because we are afraid of the pain they come with, because we want a positive image of ourselves to remain fresh in our minds. I say this not as an expert in the field of psychology, but as an observer. I, for example, wasn't feeling too strong when my emotionality stopped me from obÞit has something I wanted, neither on the days when the feeling of anxiety oppressed me for hours, nor when I had a lot to learnÞat ANDand to work, but not badANDI can't concentrate at all ANDnor when I became irritable with those around me. I appreciate myself, however, now, because I allowed myself to publicly expose this self-analysis. The path to self-love begins with seeing ANDand hairÞgood ones, but ANDand the leastÞin good ANDand by accepting them as part of you; they are all experienceÞe ANDand experiences that contribute, conANDlike it or not, to your development as a person ANDi believe that ANDand this is part of the living complexityÞii.

This article was supposed to be called “How I LearnedÞto love me?", but aAND minÞand to say that I have learned the secret of constant self-love ANDI'm going to reveal it here. AANDlike, along the vineÞii, we never stop learningÞat, that oneANDi principle applies ANDand in this case. It's normal to beANDwe sometimes fail to accept ourselvesANDas we are, then to learnÞI have, let's goANDim again ANDand to learn moreÞwe have a little All it takes is willÞoh, patience ANDand perseveringÞah. And if these three are possible when we want to pass an exam with flying colors, advance in our career or achieve anything Þthe future that we proposed, I don't see why it wouldn't be ANDand when the stake is mental health ANDand high self-esteem.

So I invite you to askÞand why he loves youÞi. Even though the answer to this question may, at this point, be difficult to find, just trying to formulate it may be a way of showing youÞand you inANDknow you care (it's really therapeutic).

We will start:

"I love myself because I had the courage to ask for help when I needed it, because I am sensitive ANDand in that oneANDi time, strong when the situationÞask for it, because I allow myself to ANDI relax, because I know my limits, because I give everything I can to obÞit has what I want ANDand for the way I get really excited and from the most little things."

"Because I was always honest with myself and followed my intuition in the situationÞthey are difficult. Time has proven to me that you don't lieÞand yourself is the greatest service you can do yourself."

"Because every moment it seems like I'm losing hopeÞand I've reached my limit, I get up once more and continue. I love the power of being vulnerable and facing my feelings and then coming out of that moment even stronger.”

"Because I am a strong person, who regardless of the situationÞit's badANDit to rise and pass over. I love that I am both a personÞioasa and I have the courage to express my opinions and vision."

"Because I'm strong. I'm a beautiful man and I'm proud of myself."

"As a famous song at the beginning of the 2000s said, "If not me, then who?". I love myself because only I can do it to a complete and honest extent; because only self-love is unconditional and because it is the most beautiful gift I can give myself."

"Because they are. I firmly believe that no matter how many people we meet and how much we experience in this life, the only constant is the fact that we have ourselves."

"Because I know myself best - I know how to soothe my tears and how to make myself smile, I know what I need to hear to overcome any challenge and I know what I need to do to feel loved."

"Because I always gave 100% for myself and because I know that I will continue to invest everything I have to develop myself and achieve my dreams."